Some stories I've seemed to be hearing all of my life,or at least all of my adult life.Recently a friend of mine was lamenting how,in this day and age,in this expensive city we live in,that there seems all too little time to spend with her two children.She is employed in the IT industry,as is her husband.Both incomes are needed to get by in this economy.So,her children start their career early too,that career being daily attendance at a child care center.They are up at the crack of dawn,then hustled into a car and delivered to the childcare center before their parents are off on a rather long commute.By the time nine o'clock rolls around,both parents and children have already logged about three hours.My friend seems to think there is something wrong with this picture.You see,she'd really like to be a full time mother.And just for the record,I'm with her.There must be a better way.
Now I know that my comments here are likely to be controversial There is a lot of truth in the old adage that "The hand that rocks the cradle moves the world". I'm likely to draw the ire of radical ,and perhaps some not so radical feminists as well.Fair enough.But I'm kind of stuck on the idea that the world would be a better place if children were raised by their mothers.That is,if the economic reality was such that mothers could be full time mothers,our society would be much better off.To be sure,I'm not saying that mothers should be compelled to stay at home.I note that my friend has indicated a preference that may not be shared by all.The problem is that it's not a realistic preference.Working mothers have become the rule,not the exception even in most two parent homes.And the result is that kids don't really get to be kids.They are up early,separated from loving parents and left to learn their values from the daycare industry.From professionals rather than close family.
For years here in Canada,we've been hearing about a national childcare strategy,but nothing much ever seems to come of it.It's a hot topic at election time,then seems to find it's way onto a political back burner until the next election cycle.My question is this.Even if we agree that government should be involved in providing childcare,could it be that they are barking up the wrong tree? Instead of supporting facility based child care and it's attendant heavily bureaucratized industry,funded by tax payers,why not simply compensate parents directly for remaining in the home and raising children?
I don't want to suggest that the state of the world,as we find it is the result of mothers not being at home with young children.To be certain there is very little that could be seen as a direct causal link.But the state of society,and we only have to briefly open any given newspaper to be convinced of this,is rather scary.It's simply time to try something radically different.It's time to try teaching values at home,simply to try to overcome a world that is increasingly hostile and disrespectful,even dangerous.So if we really believe that it's the hand that rocks the cradle that moves the world,it's time to start making it possible for parents to teach values at home. It's time that there was a viable alternative to having children learn in their early formative years,only those values that are available from their particular non-parental caregivers.
Raising children is an investment.Paid childcare staff,however good they may be cannot take the place of loving parents.So I'm simply suggesting that we pay mothers to stay in the home,if they wish to.Surely it's preferable to our current view of young children as being a commodity that drives the childcare industry.It really comes down to a question of value. In my world,the opportunity to have a true childhood is to be valued over the existence of children as cogs in the industrial wheel that drives the childcare sector. Daily,ongoing interaction between child and parent is to be valued over hurried interactions dictated by the reality of the rat race,by children and parents both who are simply going through the motions of communications that are less than they could or should be.
So,it's time for government to step up and try to structure a better society.That starts at home,and it takes financial commitment,which we should all be calling on our law makers to make.I am convinced that it will be worth it,but it involves valuing family and,ultimately society over narrow corporate interests.
Blyndpapaya
No comments:
Post a Comment